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#CareerAdvice : #WomenCareer – 5 Successful Women Give Advice they Wish they Would Have Taken in Their 20s. Got Daughters? Great Read!

February 19, 2019/in First Sun Blog/by First Sun Team

Our 20s are a time of tremendous career growth and learning. But this doesn’t come without some hurdles and hiccups, even if you ultimately end up as a successful professional or entrepreneur. We spoke to successful women about their own regrets in their 20s.

Everything may happen for a reason, but if they could rewind time and change their approach, they could have fine-tuned their journey to the top. From taking advantage of having no strings attached and seeing the world to raising your hand and asking questions, here is the advice these women business owners wish they would have taken.

“GO TRAVEL AND EXPERIENCE THE WORLD”

In her 20s, Amanda Bradford, founder and CEO of The League, was busy. By the time she reached 29 in 2014, she was building her now uber-successful dating app. To date, The League has a 1.5 million person waitlist across 60 cities domestically and internationally, and has grown 100% year-over-year since its launch. Now 34, Bradford is happy with the success she’s found and the connections she’s been able to foster, but she wishes she would have taken the advice of her former boss at Google who urged her to go see the world. “Anyone who takes that leap of faith and moves abroad to continue education or work rarely regrets it. For me, global work experience and travel are key contributors to business and personal fulfillment. I wish I had invested more in global exposure during my 20s,” she says.

Launching a company didn’t allow her the time or flexibility to pack a bag and go:

I wish I had traveled and forged my own global experience in my 20s because now it’s just too hard. I’m devoted to The League and its rapid growth. As the app expands into international cities–already in London and Paris–it would be helpful to have firsthand knowledge of each market and a network of people on the ground.

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“DON’T BE AFRAID TO ASK QUESTIONS”

In a world that’s ripe with farm-to-table options, Suzanne Simon had a different idea: farm-to-taco. In 2013, she created Chaia Tacos in Washington, D.C., at the White House Farmer’s Market. At the time, First Lady Michelle Obama had launched the “Let’s Move” campaign, and it inspired Simon (and her business partner) to source local vegetables and develop seasonal recipes, honing in on sustainability and healthy eating. Though her 13-year-old daughter was skeptical of squash tacos, they’ve sold more than 1 million to date.

Growing her business, Simon wishes she wouldn’t have been afraid to ask questions. As the oldest child of two younger sisters in a divorced family, her mom worked long hours, leaving her siblings to care for themselves. When she reached adulthood and took her first gig at an environmental consulting firm in Washington, D.C., she felt like she still needed to have all the answers without posing any questions:

I remember worrying about a project, and my sister said, ‘You know, you don’t have to solve every problem and know everything.’ If I had taken her advice at the time, I think I would have been more focused on solutions and would have gone into making mistakes with more confidence. It has taken me many years to learn to let go, accept mistakes, and realize that I can’t control everything. Take advice—and outsource.

Much like not being able to ask questions, the best advice from Ali Grant, founder of Be Social PR, to twentysomethings is to, well, take advice. “I thought I could do it all and knew it all. Turns out, I didn’t. I made a lot of mistakes in leadership and large business decisions that ultimately caused a lot of unnecessary stress,” she continued. Even with early hurdles, now that she’s more than six years into business, her company has grown from barely hitting five figures to a multimillion-dollar business. And in the past year alone, she’s seen 51% growth.

It’s because she’s been able to listen to others’ wisdom and outsource areas she’s not an expert in that she has met and exceeded objectives. She didn’t listen right away, though, to people like her uncle, who encouraged her to hire a payroll company or hire a bookkeeper:

Hiring someone that specializes in bookkeeping is essential. Now, our accounting team is one of the most valuable parts of the business. You can’t know it all, especially at 24 years old. I wish I would have absorbed more advice from a strong mentor and other seasoned business leaders, so I could have avoided the mistakes I made. Change your attitude and you’ll change your income.

After high school, Ronda Jackson was working for a door-to-door sales company selling multipurpose cleaner. Every day, the “car handler,” as she called him, would repeat this mantra: “Change your attitude and you’ll change your income,” as they went from neighborhood to neighborhood. She wasn’t making sales–or having a good day–and didn’t listen. Now, as the founder and chief workplace stylist for Decor Interior Design, Inc., she wishes she would have listened:

I later learned that limiting beliefs inhibits your capacity, ambition, prosperity, relationships, health, quality of life, and ability to make a meaningful impact on the things you care about most. Looking back, it was a brief life lesson not about selling soap, but instead not letting your current circumstances get in the way of who you want to be.

Her outlook definitely changed for the positive, since what once started as a one-woman show has grown into a multimillion-dollar firm that is in the Inc. 5000.

“GIVE YOURSELF SOME GRACE”

When you’re such an overachiever that you decide to audition for American Gladiators on your wedding day, you know you’re the type of person who doesn’t slow down. After six weeks of filming, Ally Davidson became the Grand Champion but had to wait three months to spill the beans. She took that prize money and turned a lifelong dream into a reality, launching the first Camp Gladiator in Dallas. As the cofounder and co-CEO, Davidson’s brainchild is on track to exceed $60 million this year, and has an impressive 950 partner trainers that provide more than 4,000 locations across North Carolina, Louisiana, Tennessee, Texas, Colorado, and Florida. This equates to around 90,000 campers attending Camp Gladiator in any given month.

If it sounds like a fast-paced, bootstrapped business, that’s because it is. Now in her early 30s, Davidson wishes she would taken the advice of her business coach and given herself more of a break instead of pushing full throttle:

When you’re constantly going at 100 mph, you will make mistakes and lose focus along the way. Every year, your priorities will continue to shift, and all of a sudden you don’t have the same time, energy, or focus you once had. But that’s okay. You have to learn to let the little things go, pick a few things to really focus on, and always make sure you have good harmony in your life to give yourself the breaks you deserve.

FastCompany.com | February 19, 2019 | BY LINDSAY TIGAR 5 MINUTE READ

#Leadership : #CareerAdvice – Undermined at the Office? How Women Can Cope With Mistreatment From Female Colleagues…Mistreatment can Range from Humiliating Put-Downs to Intentional Sabotage, Experts say.

September 1, 2018/in First Sun Blog/by First Sun Team

Do some women undermine other women? It is one of the trickiest workplace issues.

Managerial women often hesitate to speak openly about female colleagues undercutting each other—and not just because doing so seems to reinforce a negative stereotype. Even those who have clashed with female colleagues say broader gender bias in pay and promotions pose bigger career obstacles. And such undermining appears less common than it used to be as more women reach higher management and actively mentor less experienced women.

Nevertheless, run-ins with undermining women at work can still happen, career advisers and recruiters say, and there are ways of coping. Among them: Find allies in the office who support you, says Gail R. Meneley, co-founder of Shields Meneley Partners, a career-transition firm for top executives.

“You must forge close enough ties that those allies can judge you and your work themselves,” she said.

Women who undermine other women sometimes do so when they feel precarious about their own position and view the other woman as a competitive threat, experts say. This attitude can stem from the belief that there are limited avenues for women to advance in an organization. In other instances, women who may be perceived as undermining could actually be trying to help by doling out the same tough advice given to them earlier in their career.

Mistreatment can range from humiliating put-downs to intentional sabotage, and targeted women tend to be outspoken and are often chided for making their voices heard, career advisers and university researchers say.

Leadership coach Perry Yeatman advises the female chief executive officer of a family-owned consulting firm whose board chairwoman belittles her in front of her management team, Ms. Yeatman said.

“My client’s boss makes her feel like she’s underperforming, and so she wonders if she really is as good as she believed and her results indicate,” Ms. Yeatman said. “Women shouldn’t tolerate bad behavior just because it comes from another woman.”

Workplaces, of course, abound with examples of supportive women helping other women succeed. Mary Barra became the first woman to head a major car company in 2014 when she was named chief executive at General Motors Co. Ms. Barra has several female executives reporting to her and is expanding that pool. Dhivya Suryadevara, GM’s vice president of corporate finance, will advance to chief financial officer next month.

There remains little agreement on the extent of the problem of women undermining other women, but recent research sheds some light on such misbehavior. Women are 14% to 21% more likely than men to report experiencing uncivil treatment from female co-workers, according to a study led by Allison S. Gabriel, an associate professor at University of Arizona’s Eller College of Management.

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The study, which reflects three surveys covering 1,340 male and female employees in the U.S. in a variety of occupations and industries, defined incivility as being ignored, interrupted, mocked or treated disrespectfully. It found that women mistreated by female counterparts reported lower job satisfaction.

“We are the first to help clarify that it [fusion_builder_container hundred_percent=”yes” overflow=”visible”][fusion_builder_row][fusion_builder_column type=”1_1″ background_position=”left top” background_color=”” border_size=”” border_color=”” border_style=”solid” spacing=”yes” background_image=”” background_repeat=”no-repeat” padding=”” margin_top=”0px” margin_bottom=”0px” class=”” id=”” animation_type=”” animation_speed=”0.3″ animation_direction=”left” hide_on_mobile=”no” center_content=”no” min_height=”none”][incivility] seems to be more of an experience women are experiencing from other women than from men,” Ms. Gabriel said.

Most women at a 2016 program on female rivalry hosted by the National Association for Female Executives reported that other women had undermined them, yet only a handful admitted to acting that way themselves, said Betty Spence, president of NAFE.

“Women don’t see themselves as undermining other women,” she said.

For some women who feel undermined, the only recourse is to change jobs. Kerry Jordan, a financial-services industry veteran, said a female executive she reported to in a past position repeatedly undermined her, including criticizing her public-speaking skills to their colleagues behind her back. When the female supervisor nixed Ms. Jordan’s request to accept an outside directorship on a board, she left the company.

Rayona Sharpnack, an organizational consultant, said she counseled a vice president at a Fortune 500 health-care company who told the consultant that another female VP stole customers and territory from her.

Ms. Sharpnack persuaded her client to signal the other woman’s importance by occasionally praising her competitive prowess during meetings. The complimented vice president subsequently approached her colleague and “created a couple of things that they could collaborate on,” Ms. Sharpnack said.

Such moves don’t always work. An executive recruiter tried—and failed—to mend a strained relationship through respectful chats after placing a longtime friend in the highest human-resources job at an East Coast hedge fund. The friend soon turned on her, lambasting the recruiter’s judgment and fees in front of the fund’s CEO.

“I was being betrayed and undermined by the very person I had introduced to the firm,” the recruiter said. During one face-to-face encounter about her mistreatment, the recruiter said the HR chief blamed work-related stress and said, “Don’t take it personally.’’

A New York lawyer at an Asian bank curbed her female mentor’s unsupportive behavior by divulging less. In 2013, the lawyer told her mentor that she planned to take advantage of their company’s policy and work from home one day a week once she returned from maternity leave. Her mentor cautioned that “you really are giving up your career plans,” she said, and mocked the altered schedule, joking sarcastically that she’d “love to work in my pajamas once in a while.”

The lawyer stopped discussing her personal life with the executive. “I don’t want to share things that can be used against me,” she said.

Despite her mentor’s dire prediction, the attorney advanced to director from vice president the year after her maternity leave ended.

—Ms. Lublin, former management news editor at The Wall Street Journal, is the author of “Earning It: Hard-Won Lessons from Trailblazing Women at the Top of the Business World.” (HarperCollins).

Write to the author Joann S. Lublin at joann.lublin@wsj.com

WSJ.com | August 22, 2018

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Your #Career : How #Women Can Build Their #ProfessionalNetworks … #Networking is Tougher for Women for Several Reasons, but There are Ways to Make it Work.

May 21, 2018/in First Sun Blog/by First Sun Team

Networking is crucial for advancing a career, building relationships and getting knowledgeable about a range of subjects. And women have a much tougher time of it than men.

It comes down to numbers, my research shows. There are so few women in positions of power that it is difficult for women to find sponsors to make introductions and referrals, and models of effective leadership are geared toward men. And because of that, women begin to believe not only that the cards are stacked against them but also that there is something wrong with networking itself.

Bonding problems

Of course, it can be daunting for both men and women to reach out to people who are more senior and outside their immediate area. But women’s difficulties with workplace networking go beyond that. People form and maintain relationships easily and spontaneously with others like them, decades of research shows. When an organization’s senior ranks and an industry’s power players are mostly male, the “likes attract” principle means that women often have to work harder to build relationships with decision makers and influential stakeholders.

At the same time, there are few other women around for women to build professional relationships with. The result? Women are consistently excluded from male-dominated social gatherings, which let businesspeople talk shop and bounce ideas in an informal atmosphere that builds camaraderie and trust.

Compounding the problem is that men and women tend to favor different leisure and extracurricular pursuits. So men find it much easier to mix play and work in the first place, with pursuits such as golf, while women often struggle to combine the two spheres of life.

In my research, I ask people to list all the contacts they consult for work matters, as well as the friends they hang out with outside of work. Men often have some people on both lists—they’ll play squash or go to dinner with some of those work contacts. Women, in contrast, are more likely to have two separate lists. This difference is most pronounced for women who have children, when outside-of-work relationships tend to become more driven by school activities and family.

All of which means it takes longer for women to achieve influence. It also increases the likelihood that women will have unfavorable views about networking. The more we differ from key stakeholders, and the more we have to go out of our way to interact informally with them, the more likely we’ll view networking as disingenuous and calculating. So women begin to see networking as being about selfish gain and using people.

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Breaking barriers

Aspiring women leaders can start taking charge of their network with three tactics.

Be a bridge. The best way for women to expand their professional relationships is by making connections across the diverse circles that make up their network.

For example, one marketing executive for a large manufacturing firm found herself attending events in which ideas were presented on which she knew could help her colleagues. She started writing up what she was seeing in a LinkedIn blog, and that raised her visibility in the company. When she met the author of a new book on agile working, she knew his methodology could potentially transform her firm’s operations. So she introduced him to a manager she had gotten to know through the LinkedIn column. Five years later, the methodology was in place across the organization—and she landed a promotion.

Limited Access

Women are less likely than men to say they have substantive interaction with a senior leader at least monthly, and the difference grows as they move up the career ladder.

*Vice president and above

Source: LeanIn.Org and McKinsey & Co. Women in the Workplace 2017 survey of 70,000 men and women

Do it your way. Effective networking usually involves investing time in extracurricular activities. But many women balk at what seems to be limited choice among things they are not very interested in, such as playing golf or attending sporting events. I have seen many savvy networkers, however, leverage a personal interest into something more strategic in the workplace.

Take, for instance, one investment banker who was passionate about the theater. Frustrated that she kept missing plays she wanted to see, she made her passion part of her business development. Four times a year, her secretary booked tickets, organized an informal buffet dinner at a restaurant near the theater and invited her clients, prospective clients and other key people she wanted to get to know better. The stage became a backdrop for developing her own business and facilitating connections among people in her networks.

Join a women’s professional network. Because women’s informal networks tend to have separate work and social spheres, it can be harder for women to achieve their potential. Joining a women’s network, such as the Wing, is a great way to bring the two spheres together. A women’s network can be a supportive setting for women to compare notes and reinforce one another’s learning. One website founder from New Zealand told me, “Coming here, there is a sense of comfort; you can fully relax.”

Ultimately, it is women’s misconceptions about networking that hold them back. If you believe you will never be any good at it or that you are wasting time, if there is a voice in your head telling you it is self-serving and political, you won’t commit to breaking your usual routine.

The only way to debunk such limiting assumptions is for women to try it and learn from their own experience that networking is one of the most valuable ways to invest their time.

Ms. Ibarra is the Charles Handy professor of organizational behavior at the London Business School. She can be reached at reports@wsj.com.

Appeared in the May 21, 2018, print edition as ‘What Women Need to Do to Network.’

Your #Career : 5 Tips To Help Women Work Longer…Women are Working Longer before Retiring, or Working Part-Time in Retirement, & That’s a Good Thing.

July 3, 2016/in First Sun Blog/by First Sun Team

Let’s start with the big picture and why I find this trend to be a silver lining for boomer women — both financially and spiritually. Then I’ll offer some advice on ways women can successfully stay on the job and use these bonus working years to strengthen their finances as they age.

A recent study, Women Working Longer: Facts and Some Explanations, presented by Harvard University economists Claudia Goldin and Lawrence F. Katz at the National Bureau of Economic Research’s Women Working Longer conference last month, reported that women have been working longer for a long time. Their labor market participation increased decade after decade during the 20^th century, as more women entered the labor force.

The New Story About Working Women

But that’s an old story, they wrote. “The new story is that a large fraction of women are working a lot longer, past their sixties and even into their seventies,” said the report.

In fact, the U.S. Bureau of Labor Statistics projects that by the end of this decade, about 20% of women over 65 will be in the labor force.

“Women’s increased participation beyond their fifties is a change of real consequence,” according to Goldin and Katz. “Rather than being an increase in marginal part-time workers, the higher labor force participation of older women consists disproportionately of those working at full-time jobs. Women are remaining on their jobs as they age rather than scaling down or leaving for positions with shorter hours and fewer days.”

Four factors that have influenced the uptick: More women have been holding jobs with greater advancement, have been college graduates, were not currently married or were married to men who also extended employment into their later years.

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Working for the Money — or Not

Sometimes, the women aren’t working because they need to, financially.

“From my work with Katz, we find a strong increase in employment among the most highly educated of those women older than fifty-five and for those who are in managerial and professional occupations — even if their financial security appears to be reasonable,” Goldin told me. “Higher levels of employment for women older than fifty-five years also appear to be among those who are healthier and whose occupations are the most rewarding and least physically taxing.” (This echoes the survey conducted by Elizabeth Fideler for her book, Women Still at Work.)

In other cases, however, money is very much a factor.

Olivia S. Mitchell, executive director of the Pension Research Council at The Wharton School of The University of Pennsylvania Mitchell and Annamaria Lusardi, a professor of economics and accountancy at The George Washington University School of Business, report in their new study, Older Women’s Labor Market Attachment, Retirement Planning, and Household Debt:

“When we explore the reasons for delayed retirement among older women…household finances also appears to be playing a key role, in that older women today have more debt than previously…In large part this can be attributed to having taken on larger residential mortgages due to the run-up in housing prices over time and lower down payments as well.”

Other gauges of financial distress, they said: few women are able to easily cover their expenses in a typical month or have set aside emergency fundsto cover expenses for three months. Many women also said they didn’t pay off credit card balances in full, paid only the minimum due and were charged fees for late payments or exceeding the limits.

Catherine Collinson, president of Transamerica Center for Retirement Studies and Transamerica Institute, recently told a U.S. Senate Special Committee on Aging hearing that her organization’s surveys found that only 42% of women workers say they are building a large enough nest egg to retire without financial worries, compared to 55% of men.

“Women age 50 and older — especially unmarried women — face extreme financial risks and potential poverty in retirement,” Collinson told me when I interviewed for a previous Next Avenue article. Many women Transamerica surveyed say they plan to work until age 70 or later — or don’t plan to retire at all.

The Financial Bonuses for Women Working Longer

Fortunately, when I touched based with Mitchell this week, she noted that there were a host of financial bonuses for women extending careers.

“Longer work reduces the drawdown on financial assets,” she told me. “Longer work could lengthen the time one is covered by employer-based health insurance, hence diminishing personal spending on health care costs. And a longer worklife can contribute to enhanced well being due to continued relationships with co-workers and social networks.”

And, as they say on late night TV infomercials, there’s more!

“Work can provide important resources for women — such as a sense of meaning and purpose, a positive identity, and a social network — in addition to financial benefit,” said Colorado State Assistant Professor Gwenith Fisher, who has been studying when and why people retire. Fisher was on a Future of Work and Retirement panel I recently moderated at Columbia University’s 2016 Age Boom Academy.

Moreover, added Fisher, “continuing to work is also associated with cognitive and health benefits: research that has studied patterns of cognitive functioning has shown that working in jobs that involve thinking, problem solving, and creativity is related to less cognitive decline, and retirement is also linked to earlier mortality, even among people who did not retire due to their health.”

Of course, men can enjoy these benefits by working longer, too.

(More: A Sneak Peek Into the Future of Work and Retirement)

Working Longer and Social Security

Working longer can provide women with a significant financial boost from Social Security, too.

Women are more dependent on Social Security than men and their average Social Security income is roughly 77% of that of men, according to research by Aine Ni Leime of Case Western Reserve University. Moreover, said Ni Leime (who recently presented research at the Work and Family Researchers Network annual conference in Washington, D.C.), women are 56% of all Social Security beneficiaries age 62 and older and 66% of all beneficiaries age 85 and older.

The potential gain in Social Security benefits alone from working longer is enough to place married women on equal footing with married men in terms of Social Security wealth at age 70, according to research by Harvard economist Nicole Maestas, an expert in the study of aging who was also on my Age Boom Academy panel.

“Working beyond the Social Security early retirement age until age 70 would make a sizable increase in the magnitude of lifetime Social Security benefits to which married women are entitled,” she found. “The gain in years worked at older ages would be sufficient to offset early gaps in the earnings record, and would place women on par with men in terms of lifetime resources available to them in the latter part of life. This is because the additional years of earnings at these ages replace earlier years of low or zero earnings in the retirement benefit computation formula.”

5 Tips for Women Who Want to Work Longer

So for women who’ve been persuaded that it’s worth staying on the job beyond the traditional retirement age, here are five tips to make sure youdon’t burn out, do stay employable and can use the bonus years to prepare for a financially secure retirement:

(More: How to Love Your Job Even If You Don’t Like It)

1. Never stop learning and adding skills. It’s crucial to keep your skills sharp if you want to stay on the job. Sign up for continuing education, or professional development programs offered by your employer.

2. Keep up on trends in your industry. Then, when attractive opportunities arise at work, you’ll be ready to raise your hand for them. One suggestion: set up a Google Alert to alert you about the latest news in your field.

3. Ramp up your financial literacy. Learn all you can about investing, retirement savings and Social Security strategies. Mitchell and Lusardi found that women who were more financially literate were more likely to plan for retirement, were less likely to have excessive debt and were less likely to be financially fragile.

4. Calculate your retirement savings needs and save at a level to achieve them. Among women who estimated their retirement savings needs, 62% say they “guessed,” according to Transamerica. Only 7% had completed a worksheet or done a calculation and just 3% consulted a financial adviser for the figure.

5. Continue participating in your employer’s retirement plan. The longer you work, the longer you can keep contributing and stave off dipping into those funds, allowing them to grow tax-deferred. That way your money works longer, too.

Forbes.com | July 3, 2016 | Next Avenue

Your #Career : The Woman’s Guide To Getting Back On Her Own Two Feet….Women are Often the Default Caregivers in many Families. This often Results in the Decision to Leave the Workplace which Can have Detrimental Effects on their Career When Returning to the Workplace.

February 22, 2016/in First Sun Blog/by First Sun Team

Sadly, the longer a woman off-ramps, the harder it is to get back into her field of choice. When deciding to start a family, these are the issues that should be discussed ahead of time via proper planning to ensure a smooth on-ramp back into the workplace.

Free- Women Looking over Snow Area

On the upside, we do live longer, but those of us who stay at home with children to raise them ourselves also have the burden of sacrifice our highest earning potential during our child-bearing years.

One of the best parts about running a blog that discusses women and money is the interactions I have with women behind the scenes. Readers, needing answers to pressing money issues. And, while I am not a financial advisor, and articles written here or across other social networks and partner sites should never be construed as such, I am often able to give insight into issues that come up during our email exchanges.

A question often asked is:

“How can I make my own money without sacrificing time with my family? I want to stand on my own 2 feet”

Why This Is Important

This is an important issue for women as we should be able to stand on our own so that we’re prepared for whatever life brings our way. We’re not five year olds needing to ask daddy for $5 to buy ice-cream. Yes, this is a touchy subject, depending on who you’re talking to but an important topic nonetheless. Too many women find themselves without options once their partners are no longer in the equation, whatever the reason.

Understanding the minutia of money management is of utmost importance as we often think that if we make the money, the money management skills will just show up. Not at all. In fact, the opposite is true. We must master our money mindset before we make the moolah! Teaching yourself these principles will give you the foundations needed to be successful.

Now let’s talk about you, the budding money making machine!

Barriers To Financial Independence?

Looking at this closely will help you figure out why things are the way they are.

The replies I often get are:

“My husband manages all of it”

“I don’t know how to…I haven’t had a job in years..”

“I’ve been taking care of our kids so money was the last thing on my mind”

One of the best pieces of money advice my mom gave me years ago is that:

“Women often work hard at teaching their children the art of being independent while abdicating that responsibility to themselves”

We simply must stop giving up power in our relationships this way.

I think it’s great that we want to be there for our kids when they’re growing up but we often forget about who we will be once they are independent and don’t need us anymore. It is often after the kids are in school or the unfortunate event of a separation or divorce that some women think about returning to work and how they will support themselves. But it can be done with some forethought and careful planning.

Amber Wright of TalktoAmber.com discussed how she managed the transition back after the birth of her children:

To manage my transition back to work after having both of my daughters, I gave myself time to prepare mentally and physically. At least two weeks before my return, I started using my alarm clock again to help wake me up earlier. We also did test runs with the sitter so our family could adjust and not go into shock overnight. Involving my husband in the process made a difference, as well. My heart still ached terribly, thinking about how much I’d miss my babies, but the early start helped make it a little easier!

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MB from Washington, DC had a particularly difficult time deliberating her return due to her son’s illness:

… returning to work after Dominic was born was particularly hard. I know that that is something that all mothers struggle with but Dominic had spent quite some time in the hospital. He was born 7 weeks early and became very sick. Three months of his life we spent in the NICU Hopkins. Which meant three months of his life he was cared for by someone else. In thinking about returning to work there was a tremendous amount of guilt. Not just the guilt that comes from attempting to balance being a mother and being career woman but also something deeper.
Something that stemmed from the fact that, while I know I could not care for him when he was sick that it was still my job as his mother. So I’m on maternity leave was finally up and it came time for me to return to work I seriously considered becoming a stay at home mom. This turned out to not the feasible for my family because we could not afford it. But beyond that being financially feasible, I realize that my career as a part of who I am. I worked long and I worked hard to get where I am and my career. I dedicated the majority of my life to my education into decisions that would create opportunities for me and for my family. Some of those opportunities stem from the places that my career has taken me. The truth is, I like having a powerful job. I like having influence and I like being able to provide for myself and for my family. I like that I have a career not a job but a career. So it came time to consider what was best from my son I realized that I had to do what was best for me. I had to wait the opportunities that are created by having “enough.” So many families struggle with “not enough”. I didn’t want mine to be one of them.

… but I digress. I realized that I had to push down the guilt and consider that perhaps being a mom isn’t just about being present. That it isn’t just about being able to cook every meal and kiss every boo boo. I realized that it had to be about, at least for me, showing my son that there is a balance. That mom will always love him and will always be there to kiss every boo boo if he needs it.
But also but there are other sides to me and to all people. Being Dominic’s mother is the greatest blessing and privilege I have ever been given. It is more important than anything I will ever do. Is more profound than a job I will ever have. He is the most important thing in my life. But it is okay for him not to be the only thing. I realize that being a mother is not the sum total of me and that’s okay. Part of being a mom is providing an example. He should know that people work for opportunity. He should know that women can be accomplished and educated and powerful and can provide.
My son will know these things because I will show him. I have ambitions and dreams and goals that I will work to attain as his mother not in spite of being his mother. People think you have to choose. People think you have to pick a side – motherhood or career. I disagree. I think maybe part of being a good mother is being well rounded. It’s finding a way to be happy. If you’re happy involves success in your career can you find the way to balance it. You make a way to be both a great mother and advance your career in that order.

As you can see, this can be a difficult balance because many women struggle with the decision of having to decide between work and childcare.

However, if you’re planning to stay at home with the kids once you have them, create a plan that enables you to keep your resume fresh and skills updated while you do so. One never knows what the future holds which may lead to you to re-enter the workforce hoping that someone will hire you once again.

Communication

Talk to your partner about managing your money together if you don’t already have that arrangement in your relationship. At the very least, you should have a role in the management of the money in your relationship.

Maintain access to all accounts. You’d be surprised how many women don’t have access to the money they make. Know where your accounts are stored, check your credit report as well as your partner’s and review the status of all accounts listed on the credit report to keep yourself abreast of everything going on financially.

Women are often the default caregivers in many families. This often results in the decision to leave the workplace which can have detrimental effects on their career when returning to the workplace.

Sadly, the longer a woman off-ramps, the harder it is to get back into her field of choice. When deciding to start a family, these are the issues that should be discussed ahead of time via proper planning to ensure a smooth on-ramp back into the workplace.

On the upside, we do live longer, but those of us who stay at home with children to raise them ourselves also have the burden of sacrificing our highest earning potential during our child-bearing years.

One of the best parts about running a blog that discusses women and money is the interactions I have with women behind the scenes. Readers, needing answers to pressing money issues. And, while I am not a financial advisor, and articles written here or across other social networks and partner sites should never be construed as such, I am often able to give insight into issues that come up during our email exchanges.

A question often asked is:

“How can I make my own money without sacrificing time with my family? I want to stand on my own 2 feet”

Why This Is Important

This is an important issue for women as we should be able to stand on our own so that we’re prepared for whatever life brings our way. We’re not five year olds needing to ask daddy for $5 to buy ice-cream. Yes, this is a touchy subject, depending on whom you’re talking to but an important topic nonetheless. Too many women find themselves without options once their partners are no longer in the equation, whatever the reason.

The Road Back To Independence

The money struggle for women is real. Whether you’re married, single or newly divorced and want to learn how to manage money properly, it’s best to start here: 21 Days To Rock Your Finances: Day 1- Create A 1 Year Financial Plan.

Understanding the minutia of money management is of utmost importance as we often think that if we make the money, the money management skills will just show up. Not at all. In fact, the opposite is true. We must master our money mindset before we make the moolah! Teaching yourself these principles will give you the foundations needed to be successful.

Now let’s talk about you, the budding money making machine!

Barriers To Financial Independence?

Looking at this closely will help you figure out why things are the way they are.

The replies I often get are:

“My husband manages all of it”

“I don’t know how to…I haven’t had a job in years..”

“I’ve been taking care of our kids so money was the last thing on my mind”

One of the best pieces of money advice my mom gave me years ago is that:

“Women often work hard at teaching their children the art of being independent while abdicating that responsibility to themselves”

We simply must stop giving up power in our relationships this way.

I think it’s great that we want to be there for our kids when they’re growing up but we often forget about who we will be once they are independent and don’t need us anymore. It is often after the kids are in school or the unfortunate event of a separation or divorce that some women think about returning to work and how they will support themselves. But it can be done with some forethought and careful planning.

Amber Wright of TalktoAmber.com discussed how she managed the transition back after the birth of her children:

To manage my transition back to work after having both of my daughters, I gave myself time to prepare mentally and physically. At least two weeks before my return, I started using my alarm clock again to help wake me up earlier. We also did test runs with the sitter so our family could adjust and not go into shock overnight. Involving my husband in the process made a difference, as well. My heart still ached terribly, thinking about how much I’d miss my babies, but the early start helped make it a little easier!

MB from Washington, DC had a particularly difficult time deliberating her return due to her son’s illness:

… returning to work after Dominic was born was particularly hard. I know that that is something that all mothers struggle with but Dominic had spent quite some time in the hospital. He was born 7 weeks early and became very sick. Three months of his life we spent in the NICU Hopkins. Which meant three months of his life he was cared for by someone else. In thinking about returning to work there was a tremendous amount of guilt. Not just the guilt that comes from attempting to balance being a mother and being career woman but also something deeper.
Something that stemmed from the fact that, while I know I could not care for him when he was sick that it was still my job as his mother. So I’m on maternity leave was finally up and it came time for me to return to work I seriously considered becoming a stay at home mom. This turned out to not the feasible for my family because we could not afford it. But beyond that being financially feasible, I realize that my career as a part of who I am. I worked long and I worked hard to get where I am and my career. I dedicated the majority of my life to my education into decisions that would create opportunities for me and for my family. Some of those opportunities stem from the places that my career has taken me. The truth is, I like having a powerful job. I like having influence and I like being able to provide for myself and for my family. I like that I have a career not a job but a career. So it came time to consider what was best from my son I realized that I had to do what was best for me. I had to wait the opportunities that are created by having “enough.” So many families struggle with “not enough”. I didn’t want mine to be one of them.

… but I digress. I realized that I had to push down the guilt and consider that perhaps being a mom isn’t just about being present. That it isn’t just about being able to cook every meal and kiss every boo boo. I realized that it had to be about, at least for me, showing my son that there is a balance. That mom will always love him and will always be there to kiss every boo boo if he needs it. But also but there are other sides to me and to all people. Being Dominic’s mother is the greatest blessing and privilege I have ever been given. It is more important than anything I will ever do. Is more profound than a job I will ever have. He is the most important thing in my life. But it is okay for him not to be the only thing. I realize that being a mother is not the sum total of me and that’s okay.
Part of being a mom is providing an example. He should know that people work for opportunity. He should know that women can be accomplished and educated and powerful and can provide. My son will know these things because I will show him. I have ambitions and dreams and goals that I will work to attain as his mother not in spite of being his mother. People think you have to choose. People think you have to pick a side – motherhood or career. I disagree. I think maybe part of being a good mother is being well rounded. It’s finding a way to be happy. If you’re happy involves success in your career can you find the way to balance it. You make a way to be both a great mother and advance your career in that order.

As you can see, this can be a difficult balance because many women struggle with the decision of having to decide between work and childcare.

However, if you’re planning to stay at home with the kids once you have them, create a plan that enables you to keep your resume fresh and skills updated while you do so. One never knows what the future holds which may lead to you to re-enter the workforce hoping that someone will hire you once again.

Communication

Talk to your partner about managing your money together if you don’t already have that arrangement in your relationship. At the very least, you should have a role in the management of the money in your relationship.

Maintain access to all accounts. You’d be surprised how many women don’t have access to the money they make. Know where your accounts are stored, check your credit report as well as your partner’s and review the status of all accounts listed on the credit report to keep yourself abreast of everything going on financially.

How Do I Get Back And Stand On My Two Feet?

Go back to school. Start there. Did you finish college? Do you want to go back to graduate school? What are you passionate about that requires a degree or certificate? Do you need to go back to school? These are all questions that you must ask yourself if your path to returning to the work force involves going back to school.

Start A Business. Along the same lines of going back to school, what are you passionate about? Do you see a need in the market that hasn’t been filled? What problem can you solve? How can you work to fill that need while creating income for yourself? This can include producing your own stuff to sell on Etsy or Ebay to heading a startup company which solves a problem.

Update Your Skills. If you’re in a field like myself, then you’ll need to make sure that applicable licenses or certifications are always up to date as allowing them to lapse costs more time and money. Talk to the licensing or certification board within your field and find out what you need to do in order to maintain your skills in this area. If you plan on applying to jobs that require a license or certification then you’ll need to make sure this is up to date.

Attend workshops and conferences in an effort to remain up to date with the current trends in your field as well. This also gives you the opportunity to network with others which we will discuss in a bit.

Volunteer or Intern Within Your Field

This continues to be my most successful piece of advice. It has worked for me and countless others who needed a foot in the door. Yes, this does mean sacrificing time and money but when you’re in the position of needing to prove yourself, then beggars can’t be choosers.

One of our administrative assistants did this prior to obtaining a paid position with us and it worked out nicely for her. When the executive assistant that she supported quit, she was able to move into her position with relative ease while collecting a new full time paycheck.

Network, Network, Network! Did I Say Network?

I lied. This too is a great way to land a position. Network with others in your field. Go to chapter meetings, join associations and go to the hosted happy hours. Talk to others about your goals and learn to sell yourself.

Be willing to sacrifice and prove to them that you’re the woman for the job. Talking to the right person means they can possibly put in a good word for you during the hiring process.

Find A Mentor i.e. Your Sisterhood of Success AKA “Personal Board Of Advisors”

Who supports you professionally when it’s time to make hard professional decisions? Do you have a group of women or even one woman that you can turn to? I take that back, it doesn’t have to be a woman. Anyone who supports you and is able to provide professional guidance will do. Women are more successful when they have mentors guiding them both personally and professionally. Especially when women mentor women. Great things happen!

This starts with choosing your Personal Board of Advisors. Some of you might refer to this as “Big Sister in my Head”. Personally, I have always imagined Oprah and Michelle Obama as big sisters in my head, so you get my drift!

How do you choose your Personal Board of Advisors? Kathy Korman Freygives us some tips on getting started:

Visualize yourself in a room with all of the people who represent each place setting. Who do you want in that spot supporting you throughout the years?

Once you’ve picked who you want in your Sisterhood of Success, chart a plan to connect with them. This can be someone who is readily accessible or someone you’ve admired from a far. In the latter case, do your home work and make the process easier for them.
Remember, flattery will get you what you need. Let them know how much their work means to you and that will open the door to discussions around lending their time to help make you a success.

Once you have a plan stick to it! Remember, consistency is key, once you’ve established the relationship with this person, keep the lines of communication open and be flexible.

What are your thoughts on women seeking advice on how to get back on their feet, financially? What tips do you have? Stories to share? Any encouragement or advice is much appreciated!

Forbes.com | February 22, 2016 | Ginger Dean

Your #Career : Work From Home In 2016: The Top 100 Companies For Remote Jobs…These Companies Clearly Understand that Integrating Telecommuters into their Workforce is a Smart Business Strategy. Remote Working is on the Rise, & this Acceleration is Great News for anyone Wishing to Trade the Office for a Telecommuting Job.

January 28, 2016/in First Sun Blog/by First Sun Team

As technology gives us the freedom to work from anywhere, more and more people are prizing the ability to do so. Many companies are responding with flexible work schedules, and seeming to acknowledge the trend, the Department of Labor just announced that in 2017 it will resume its contingent workforce survey, which was last conducted in 2005.

FlexJobs, an online service devoted to listing telecommuting, flexible schedule, part-time and freelance work opportunities, is a prime resource for the segment of the workforce in search of such opportunities.

While one might find many spam emails or subway flyers promising work from home opportunities, FlexJobs offers up legitimate and professional listings for jobs in 50 career categories with positions ranging from entry-level to C-suite.

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The third annual list is based on an analysis of more than 40,000 companies and the jobs they posted on FlexJobs in 2015. (Check out the 2015 and 2014lists.)

Overall, the site saw a 36% increase in the number of remote listings, with computer and IT jobs topping the list of fields offering such opportunities, followed by medical and health, sales, administrative, customer service, education and training, and finally, marketing.

Some of the most popular telecommuting jobs included writer, engineer, marketing manager, healthcare consultant, case manager, development director and recruiter.

“These companies clearly understand that integrating telecommuters into their workforce is a smart business strategy,” said Sara Sutton Fell, founder and CEO of FlexJobs, in a statement. “Remote working is on the rise, and this acceleration is great news for anyone wishing to trade the office for a telecommuting job.”

Here’s the top 100 list, plus tips at the bottom on ways to make more money:

Forbes.com | January 27, 2016 | Laura Shin

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